Camp outs and Childhoods Lost

This last Friday we had a 'camp' at school. I would call it a lock-in or sleep over. The students came at 4 p.m. in the afternoon and left the next morning by 11 a.m. Now this is a common thing to do. In the churches I have attended over the last 10 years I have probably organized 8 such lock-ins. What amazed me was the 'hoo ha' made about it. There was a parents committee, hats were made with a camp logo and lots of flashlights were purchased and given. Every student who attended got a certificate. I kind of chuckled and then it hit me, oh, yeah, these are ASIAN kids.

Now I don't intend to be racist but these are observations that I have garnered over the years. Of course there will be families that are total opposites of this but here are some broad sweeping generalizations.

Asian kids live very sheltered lives. Most of them really got into the camp out when most American kids would have been bored to death. Some families in the US camp out the entire summer at the lake while Asian kids have probably never even spent the night in a tent in the backyard (Malaysia child, "Mommy, what is a backyard? I saw a picture of one once"). Several years ago, the Korean church I was attending asked me to help with a camp out. I organized the camp out, which was held on the church property in Bellingham. Every afternoon we would go to a place to swim or hike or climb around on rocks. I remember vividly the first day when we went to Larrabbee State Park, one of my favorite places in the Ham. I thought I would have trouble entertaining them but they were fascinated with the tide pools and we started trying to climb up some of the rock faces there. 4 hours flew by and as we left I realized none of the kids had ever been there despite the fact it is only 15 min from B'ham. I have biked and run there from the Ham. This trend has continued as I have known more and more Asians. Most of the kids I have known have rarely been afforded the opportunity to camp and to be outdoors for long periods of time. As I was teaching one of the kids how to roast a marshmallow on Friday night I felt a deep pang of sadness. I consider it essential to childhood to know how to make smores, to camp out and swim in the lake. Malaysians do like to go swimming in waterfalls as a family activity but most Asian children are very overprotected.

Let me finish with this thought. Perhaps it is worth it to trade the outdoors experience for parents that care deeply about their children's well being. Many American parents allow their children to experience far too much at a young age. Parental neglect, to my knowledge, is rare amongst Asians. The opposite is true. The care fiercely for their children. Grandparents raising children is now common in the USA but I don't know of a single case of this in Malaysia. The grandparents may live with them but aren't their sole guardians.

In the end, as with many things I've seen and experienced, a middle road is best. Care fiercely for your kids but allow them to experience (and to fail sometimes) all that life has to offer, when they are ready. P.S. Stand back ready to catch them should it be too much :)